Dont want preferred primary device

Hi guys. I use and Iphone11 as the Preferred Primary device. I share Roomie with my wife on the same type of device. How do I get around this primary device setup? Do I really need to get a 3rd “always on” device in order for us to both to be able to use the remote simultaneously? No other way?

Many configurations don’t need it. Depends on your devices and whether you use any of the features that require it. The Setup Guide goes into pretty good detail on exactly that.